Celebrations

Today was one of those days where ideal met reality. It wasn't a pleasant meeting for either party. It was one of those long, stress-filled, never ending, just kinda cruddy days. Nothing really bad or major happened but I was just stressed, tired, and off all day; the kind of day that affects my eating. I'm coming off of a really good streak of healthy, organic eating so I should have been on the look out for this. It happens all the time, I eat perfect for a few days and then I self-sabotage with a day of junk. It drives me crazy because I feel like I can't stop the cycle even though I know I'm doing it, even while I'm eating what I shouldn't be. I've made major progress in that area, I hardly ever self- sabotage anymore or I do it in really tiny ways which is nice to see, but it still severely irritates me when I screw up my diet. Today it was red licorice and tootsie rolls. It wasn't a huge "binge" but it was enough to stress me out even more and make me feel like I failed my eating for the day, ugh.

In the midst of it though, there is a small victory... I didn't let that bad event earlier in the day derail my eating for the remainder of the day. Usually, once I've had one bad thing, I throw in the towel and eat crap for the rest of the day because I feel like my diet is already ruined. Not today! I had eaten perfectly healthy until mid-afternoon and once I got off work, I went right back to it. Part of getting healthy and fit for me is getting mentally and psychologically healthy and fit. For me that means not being so negative and hard on myself and this was a great learning experience in that area. All afternoon , I beat myself up over those 280 calories and how I would be over my daily limit but as soon as I stopped and really thought about it, 280 calories really isn't that much and so I'm trying to let it go and not stress about it. Now at the end of the day, it doesn't seem like a huge deal whereas usually I would be beating myself up for it clear until tomorrow.

Today was also my baby brother's 16th birthday :O) It was just the fam which was nice. The brother requested breakfast for dinner: biscuits, corned beef hash, bacon, fried eggs, & juice (he can eat all of this because he's 16 with the metabolism of a freight train, lucky kid!). Since none of that is within any sort of reachable range of my healthy eating goals, I used the time instead to make up a big double batch of protein loaded cottage cheese oatmeal pancakes (sounds gross but they are amazing!). I'll have to post the recipe sometime soon. I made up one large one for me and just had the one (usually its two) with almond butter and sugar free syrup plus some of the fruit salad my mom made to go with the fam's dinner. Afterwards they had angel food cake, strawberries (fresh but soaked in sugar) and spray whip cream. I am proud to say that I had just a bite of angel food cake and a spoon fool of strawberries and whip cream and I was fine. Beyond that, it didn't really taste that good and I realized I wasn't missing anything by eating it. I was really proud of myself for making positive choices throughout the remainder of the day and not feeling deprived by it.

But my question is, what should I do at family celebration events? Is it easier to just skip desert altogether, try (and usually fail) to have just one bite, or deem it a special event and go all out? I'm really not sure. Right now for me, it's better to just skip it, because there's no having just one bite no matter what  I tell myself. What are some alternate ways to celebrate or partake in the activities? My hardest time is at large extended family gatherings (which we have frequently) where nobody brings anything healthy. It's another struggle in the battle to find the middle, somewhere between going all out and refusing it all. I'm still feeling out what that looks like but please let me know if you've got it figured out :O)